Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Stupid Church People Take a Stand!

I won't personalize this to protect individuals, so let's just say I "have a friend."

So, I have a friend who's mom died. And he wanted to have a service for her, so he contacted his old church.

Old Pastor: "Hey, brother Friend!"

Old Friend: "Hi, Pastor. Listen, my mom passed away and I'd like to know if I can book the church for her memorial service."

O.P.: "Of course, you've been a long time member and supporter of this church, whatever you need! I will be out of town that day, but you can sure use the facilities!"

Pleased, my friend then asked a former music minister at that church (who, as an aside, is now the pastor of a gay-friendly congregation) if he would do the service for his mom. No problem, said Gay Friendly Pastor. O.F. called up O.P. to pass on the news:

O.P.: "Sure, I know G.F.P.! He used to be at such-and-such church for a while... I met him before... sings and plays piano, right! Great!"

Then O.F. gets a call today:

O.P.: "Hey, uh.... brother O.F. .... uh.... I mentioned in the staff meeting that G.F.P. would be ministering your mom's service, and uh... well... somebody on staff mentioned that he was... well... I mean... did you know what he was doing?"

O.F.: "You mean that he was the pastor of a gay-friendly church?"

O.P.: "Well, yeah... I mean, somebody brought that up and asked me if I knew, and well... I might have to speak to the Board about this... Actually I was wondering if you might just consider someone else... I mean, nobody's perfect. No pastor is perfect. But if he's advocating homosexuality from the pulpit..."

O.F.: "Do you want me to come speak to the Board about this? It's my mother's funeral, it's on a Saturday, and I'm quite sure the subject of homosexuality will never even come up. Besides, I consider G.F.P. a friend and he served this congregation faithfully for years. Even taught from the pulpit. And he's the same G.F.P. today as he was back then!"

O.P.: "Well... I just feel caught in a hard place here, because I don't want to spring this on you... but I think I probably have to get the Board involved, but I'm not sure what they'll think... and I hate to ask you to have to find somebody else... but I sure am in a tough position here..."

So my friend is being asked to call up Gay Friendly-Pastor and ask him not to officiate the service for his mom. Here's what I say to my old friend:


My old friend has already talked to his wife about it, and she is about ready to leave the old church over this. Sad thing is, if my old friend and his wife leave because Gay-Friendly Pastor was asked not to speak there, that's probably nothing compared to the losses to the congregation if G.F.P. was allowed to speak--at least not now that somebody has their SCP panties in a wad over G.F.P. coming into the building and is probably prepared to take this on as their own spiritual vendetta.

Think about that. G.F.P. has gone from being a beloved member of the congregation to a homosexual. Who advocates homosexuality.

My old friend said to his old pastor, "It sounds to me like somebody's afraid his mere presence there will mean that our church endorses homosexuality!"

Exactly, said his old pastor, without a trace of irony.


At 10:02 PM, Blogger dorsey said...

Your old friend has a friend on the other side of the continent whose head is about to explode.

Send duct tape.

And O.P.'s address.

At 10:26 PM, Blogger jeff said...

Honestly... did you REALLY expect any different response??

It's the same damn playbook they've been using for the last century.

At 10:41 PM, Blogger Zeke said...

I didn't expect any response, because I couldn't see why it would be an issue... it wasn't a church function, he wasn't preaching.

I mean my friend, of course.

At 7:53 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

What an un-compassionate mess at such a time...... My sympathies.

At 9:10 AM, Anonymous Erik said...

So I go down the streets, down to my good friend's house. I said, "Look maaaan I'm outdoors you know. Can I stay with you maybe a couple days?"

He said "Let me go and ask my wife.”

He come out of the house, I could see it in his face, I knowd it was no. He said "I don't know man, ah she kinda funny, you know?"

I said "I know, everybody funny, now you funny too."


At 4:02 PM, Blogger ninjanun said...

Sometimes the sqeeky wheel should get replaced, instead of getting the grease.

At 4:56 PM, Blogger jeff said...

Would you expect a pastor to allow a rapist or a drug addict or a child molester to come to his church to perform a ceremony?

Of course not!

But of course, we all know this is a terrible example.

The problem is, most hetero-fundie-evangelicals equate homosexuality with rape, pedophilia or drug abuse.

In that pastor's mind, your G.F.P. is just such an abominable character for associating with such surly characters...

At 7:10 PM, Blogger Grampa Dan said...

Wierd, isn't it, the church building is just that, a building. You should be able to rent the building and have whom ever you want to do the service.
When my mother in-law died my sister in-law was able to read from the Jehovah's witness bible and share her memories of her mother etc. No big deal, just like it should be. If she was devil worshiper, we as a family wouldn't want her talking about Satanisim during them memorial service but she should be able to share her love and memories of her mom. I realize the pastor is not a relative, but what should that matter? I would put my money on a bet that Jesus would allow the pastor to speak, even if he didn't agree with his views on anything or everything. The time is about your mom and her memories.


At 7:37 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

OK at the risk of sounding like a complete bitch I have had it with people who assume if your gay you are not living according to the will of God. What they are assuming is because someone is gay he/she has no control over his body. Our Saviors blood stops right at there doorstep..

If your O.F. and his wife find God telling them to do something about this the O.P. and old church better watch out in a way they have no idea what to brace for cause I happen to know your O.F.'s wife and she is pissed!

Your O.F's wife feels like her home has been robbed and the thieves are having a party there drinking self rightousness and basking in there perfection. They better protect there perfect asses cause your O'F's wife if she gets a clear go from God is gonna wreck there perfect world..simply real love wrecks worlds and is completely exposing they better be ready to say "cheese"

Your O.F.'s wife wants her house back!!!

Love now, no tomorrow maybe..

At 7:59 PM, Blogger dorsey said...

YEAH!!! You give 'em hell, Mrs., I mean, anonymous person. Sounds like the makings of a good old Holy Ghost cage match! I'm in!

At 8:09 PM, Blogger Steve said...

So what has your old friend decided to do?

Honestly... to me this is worse than a 1000 Benny Hinn's or TBN's....

This is the story that needs to be printed up and passed out at that church on Sunday. The people of that church should be able to know the truth of this conversation. This bullshit church politics happens every week in most churches in America.

At 8:35 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dorsey anonymous person has no idea what her password is cause I'm on the laptop!

The whole O.F. , O.P. stuff aside I really need to keep myself in check cause I dont get mad easy and I passed just being mad yesterday so I need to make sure what God wants. It is not hard for me to fight been doing that a long long time so because it's somewhat normal for me I really need to make sure I stay in His will. Otherwise I become part of the problem. But if it comes down we can put you through the speaker system somehow :)

Steve we dont know waiting for God to direct us. God told us when we first went to our church we were suppose to be there. So we leave when He says so. Just waiting for now, which might kill me a sword is easy for me sadly....but if that is the route we are to go I am not going to get over it or weary of it.

Waiting on some wisdom
love anyway anonymous or not

At 8:50 PM, Blogger Steve said...

What time is the service... if the time is right I could pop down and do it... you know I still got that Rev. title hanging around somewhere...

But I am in the middle of a divorce... do we have to tell them cuz I am sure I'd be out too...

At 9:08 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

awww Steve your a doll. We are not giving up on Dan though we will just have it somewhere else. I would not dare have mom's goodbye there cause she would not want it there either.

The divorce thing though I would not worry about they let all the others in on Sunday....

Your loved

At 7:07 AM, Anonymous said...

Wow . . . I am always so sad to hear stories like this. The body of Christ (whether of opposite or same gender orientation) often does more harm to itself than the enemy. (I'm sure he doesn't mind the help!) Jesus told His disciples, "This is how unbelievers will know that you belong to and represent Me - by watching you demonstrate your love for Me by how you love each other." (Obviously a paraphrase, but you get the point.)

I am a Christian who happens to be gay (and some folks will stop reading my response about now, but I encourage you to hear me out, as I would you). My home church,, is full of people who have returned to Christ after years of rejecting the call of God on their lives, because the body of Christ and their families did not know how to love them with His love.

We are all finding that we have a place at the table. We are welcomed just as we are. And we are serving Him with all our heart, soul, mind and strength.

When we are all standing together around the throne, worshiping the Lamb of God, Jesus, our Savior and Lord and King - our differences will not matter anymore. So, if it won't matter in eternity - I am convinced that I have to live my life like that right now.

I have to set aside my differences, my right to be right - and love as one who has been given the ministry of reconciliation, as one who has been called to be an ambassador of Christ.

Its not me that some Christians may have to get over. Its the fact that Christ is in me. And my life is hidden in His.

If I reject a fellow believer, I am really rejecting Christ (and myself!) - because I am rejecting a member of His body.

And if I am rejected as a fellow believer - because I am gay - it hurts my feelings, but I don't take it that personally anymore. But Jesus does - He is the One being rejected, not me.

My prayer for all of you who are dealing with this situation head-on is that Jesus will give you wisdom and grace and His heart of love, to know how to confront this as aggressively as need be - yet, in a manner that remains consistent with His love. This is the body having a big, hurtful difference with the body. But we're all still members of the same body.

Zeke, thanks for posting this story on your blog. My heart goes out to your friend and his family during this time of loss. I pray the comfort of the Holy Spirit over all of them.

Blessings in Jesus,


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